a pain

SO!
I'm in this conversation with myself that I put people outand only play my life at 50%. What does that mean? A couple of examples you ask?
1. My job, I owned today that I do my job at 50%, in fact I do most things at 50% and fortunetly my 50% is pretty damn good, however....imagine, if this is me at 50%, what would life look like if I played 100%!!! My thing about work is time management. I'm spread thing and my priorities are slightly fuzzy. I do a fantastic job in my classroom, however alot of things I could do with my class, I don't because I lack Planning and Preparation. I need to do a feild experience for school which requires me to sit in a public school classroom for 15 hours and observe a teacher. It is impossible for me to sit in public school and observe and be at work at the same time. My stop is that me being out of work has an impact on people. Other staff members have to take time out of their lives to cover my shift or work their butts off to cover my class.
2. This weekend I'll be done south twice, and I really don't want to drive down south two days in a row. Although I absolutely would and it would be totally worth the drive. So I made some request but the space that it lies in me is that I'm putting Seth out to change his schedule or drive up here. I totally recognize that my uncomfort is totally with me and doesn't exsist for him. So however it works out is perfect

Life has been interesting. A game of chance and risk...an unfamiliar game. A game of excitement...we were taught in LA that we are not scared, we are excited! Thats cool!
So I am just excited in my life!
LoL
I'm playing for 100%
No more sell out Kelly....

Now I get to design what that will look like....