Does it matter anyway?

Today is another day off from work! Woohoo! I have alot to do today. I'm not encourage, inspired or motivated to do any of the tasks but i'll do it anyway. I can't shake this awful feeling of lonliness, like all the work I do just doesn't matter. I could do everything perfectly and it just wouldnt matter. I remember the evening when I distinguished that my feelings are merly guides and not alot all who I am. My feelings are not truth! I remember sitting in the bathtub and having that realization. I believe one single tear fell from my eye. It really gave me some space and freedom. Now its like practice. Reminding myself that my feelings are not true.